Ever heard that? While being alternately a cliché and the name of a series of one act plays, timing has a profound and strategic impact on us and the world around us. In the Easter story, the ancient writings say, “At just the right time….” And when we get a call or a check in the mail or run into an old friend, we might remark that it was perfect timing.

But what about a rebuke or some discipline or reprimand? Does timing make a difference?

I think it does and I’ve had opportunity to reflect upon it in the past two days. You see, I’ve been deflecting my role in the difficulties my local church has been experiencing for the past few years. Of course, while holding the office of elder and being on various leadership and vision teams I knew that I was involved in making things better or worse. I also knew that there was plenty of responsibility shared by a large number of folks for the decisions being made or not made and the setting of an atmosphere or culture that was conducive to growth or stagnation. Personally, I was experiencing renewal in my relationship with God and was seeking to be a voice for a spiritual life of dependence, prayer and solitude.

As our crisis became more intense, I observed an attitude of humility and sorrowfulness. But I had difficulty entering into those places. I believed that much of our difficulty was because we were too busy and living from our false selves pretending to be people that we weren’t. I certainly was quick to critique others’ critiques. Most of us are pretty good at finding things to be critical of. After all, we are highly educated and Western educational institutions are built upon the idea of proving your intellectual acumen through criticism. Certainly, the highest levels of literature (my specialty) include the art of critiquing the writings of others.

So, we carry that into other parts of our lives. I show my worth, value through criticizing you. What a miserable prospect.

This past Sunday when our pastor was preaching from 1^st Corinthians 3:1-10 on “The Price of Immaturity,” he said, “This has been an unstable church acting immaturely.”

It was a fist to the gut for me. I felt stung and ashamed. And for the first time, I received this critique fully. I was knocked off of my pedestal. I asked God for guidance as I was seeking to repent and agree.

Thus, the timing was right and I am in a new place concerning my role as an elder and teacher. I’m not sure what difference this will make, but I am hopeful.

What have I learned? That God’s discipline is gracious and his desire is for growth and not harm. He is the best of parents to us.

{Having recently published Sacred Heart Attack | Sacrèe Crise Cardiaque,I’ve begun writing a sequel telling of the my recovery and the aftermath of my ten dramatic days in Montreal. I’m sharing Chapter 6 of the yet to titled book that I expect to publish in early 2014. It will be more reflective and deal with some of the deeper issues surrounding a near death experience.}

(January 17, 2013) There were a couple of things that I knew would occur over the next few weeks. One, I’d be greeting good friends about every other day as they delivered meals to us. Some would want to visit and see how I was doing and ask a few questions. Others would want to make a quick stop and drop off food, but wouldn’t have time to visit. As one who’s said to have the “gift of gab” and finds it difficult to give short answers without appropriate context, I could expect to be frustrated by the brief encounters. And the longer visits would be deeply satisfying while helping me to release some of the emotional baggage I was carrying. Good baggage, but luggage that needed to be unpacked and put in its proper place. Tears would show my fear, pain, anxiety and joy. Amazing what shedding a few tears can accomplish.

Secondly, I knew that saying “I had a heart attack a couple of weeks ago…, a couple of months ago,” would be a significant part of my conversation with most everyone for a while. And with friends who were aware of my surprise heart “event” I would be explaining symptoms and warning signs that I had or had not experienced before and during the attack. There would be lots of very natural questions.

Again, I felt a combination of anxiety and welcome as I anticipated future encounters. I would learn later that one thing I had not anticipated was a conversation where a fellow traveler would share about someone close to them who didn’t make it to the hospital in time or the medical teams weren’t able to save them and the blocked artery killed them.

These encounters would hit me hard with a combination punch of sadness and wonder– sadness for my friend’s loss and wonder at God’s tender mercy for saving my life. I would ask myself what my life now meant. Was I called to make dramatic changes? Had God saved me for some enduring quest? Was he planning to re-direct my path into a new world? Or did it mean, simply and profoundly, that my time on earth was not done. I knew I had more rough edges that God could shave off before I was ready for heaven, but I knew, too, that that hasn’t stopped him from taking people in the past.

What does it mean that I am still alive?

It is a question that would be my constant companion for months to come.

Readers get a rare glimpse into the patient experience as Locklear shares the details of his major heart attack and treatment that saved his life in Sacred Heart Hospital in Montreal. He takes you inside the operating room as he narrates what was happening as the medical team worked to save his life.

Atlanta (August 23, 2013)– “Almost like the heart attack itself, the idea and demand for this story has been a total surprise,” said Decatur, GA-resident Jimmy Locklear, 61, about his new book Sacred Heart Attack | Sacrée Crise Cardiaque: A Dramatic Account of an American Heart Attack Victim in Montreal (WestBow Press, 2013). “As a long-time professional writer and marketer, I had worked on book ideas before, but this was one of the easiest manuscripts that I ever attempted to write.”

Approximately 1.4 million Americans experience a heart attack each year, but most of the family and friends of victims have no idea what the experience is like and what goes on in the emergency and operating rooms. Locklear tells his story with attention to detail and a combination of humorous observations and spiritual insights that makes for an amazing journey for readers. Locklear said that he wrote the book partially because of the enthusiastic response he received as he shared vignettes from his experience on his personal website. He also found the experience of writing to be helpful in dealing with the post-traumatic stress and anxiety that he and many other heart attack survivors experience.

“I have been a marathon runner, mostly healthy eater and only 60-years-old when the attack occurred. I was shocked. Shortly after returning home, I began writing a journal of my experience of the heart attack; rushing to the ER, emergency procedures to break up the 100% blocked “widow-maker” artery, and my time in the Sacred Heart Hospital in Montreal. Subsequently, I began posting short chapters on my website and the response was amazing,” said Locklear.

Along with being a writer, Locklear was a public relations and marketing executive in Atlanta for over 25 years. He was in Montreal for a workshop with the international organization known as L’Arche (“the Ark” in French) that focuses on building inclusive communities where adults with disabilities play a core part. He is involved in fundraising with L’Arche Atlanta. He is married and has three sons and one daughter-in-law.

Contact information: Jimmy Locklear, jimmy@jimmylocklear.com, (404)314-8016, facebook.com/jimmylocklearauthor and via twitter @j5locklear

Thank you, friends!!! Your belief and support of this project is amazing. I’m humbled and honored to know you and to be the recipient of your investment to share this story.

You are now a part of my story and I will forever be grateful to God and you. One of the simplest messages of Sacred Heart Attack is we all have stories that need to be told. Our stories of suffering, heroism, friendship and beauty give hope to all of us.

Thank you for letting me share my story.

Love and peace, Jimmy

Previously, I’ve posted chapters of my forthcoming book, Sacred Heart Attack. In order to do the kind of marketing and distribution I’d like and to broaden my person platform, I’m doing a funding project with Kickstarter.com. You can review the project here: http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/2020552486/sacred-heart-attack-book-publishing-project

And here’s the video I’m using to introduce the book and project.

January 9, 2013

Suddenly.

My heart is broke, not working.

Under attack, from within;

Relentless pain and confusion reign

As slowly clarity emerges.

What happened to me?

Did I do this?

Denial.

My God, my God, why…

But, wait, Spirit is present,

As slowly calm emerges.

Life is present.

Wholeness preserved.

Friends are present speaking prayers,

Speaking love

As slowly comfort emerges.

Plans have changed.

Life is reborn and saved.

Anxiety, fear, future and hope–

Crazy.

As slowly a new day emerges.

©Jimmy Locklear, 2013.